Hi there,
Time is flying away very fast and the tourist season is almost culminating. The weather too is getting cold especially in the morning and in the evening. But surprisingly there are still tourists that would like to visit Ladakh both foreign and domestic at this time of the year, these tourists like to avoid large crowds of tourists.
On the side of the local community it’s the peak of the marriage season and people are all busy buying gifts for their near and dear ones. In the lists of gifts people would like to give carpets, washing machines, sofas, ‘Choktse’ (traditional table), bedding items, fridges and cars in exceptional cases.
Best man of the bridegroom party with
‘Serthod’ (Golden hat attired seven men)
There is also debate going on in the community regarding the ill-side of offering excessive and elaborate gifts among many families as if there is a kind of competition? In the back drop of the families who cannot afford such gifts leading to societal’s in-equity between the have and have not?
In the recent marriages some of the families went out of their way to exhibit their wealth and abundance by providing food that is not local where the Chefs and food selections have been from outside region and not local, the trend of ‘nova-rich’on the way in Ladakh it appears.
‘Serthod’ of bridegroom party
So the question is, what would be an ideal and an appropriate marriage ceremony in the Ladakh of the future?
So that it is not exhibitionist but appropriate and good societal norms within the confinement of ever arching societal’s demand and just norms?
There is indeed space for discussion and implementation of an equitable marriage code which takes care of all stalk holders creating just norms especially taking care of those who are at the end of social strata?
Ladakhi ladies head dress ‘Perak of lined turquoise’ handed
out from mother to eldest daughter
In a closed knit society like Ladakh people borne cost of marriages in terms of number of dresses made from ‘Nambu’ (traditional woven fabrics) materials which were gifted in large numbers as dowry in the past along with ancient utensils.
Also the relatives of the family would bear so many kilograms of barley as seeds in the forth coming agriculture season in the agriculture fields of the bridegroom especially in the Serthi (Sakti ) village in upper Ladakh.
Today, things have changed and modern household items are given as gifts in place of barley other ancient goods.
In an ancient self reliant agriculture era people would measure everything in terms of barley the staple crop of Ladakh along with entire gamut of traditional products that were available then.
Even the food served during today’s marriages are more Indian in style then say Ladakhi. These include both vegetarian and non- vegetarian cuisines. Mutton includes items such as Yakni, Roghanjosh, kabab even ristas which are in fact Kashmiri cuisine.
Traditional Ladakhi marriage delicacies include ‘Polda’ tsampa or roasted barley flour dough prepared in bulk offered on plate with ‘Khyaksha’ (frozen sliced meat), ‘Chang’ in abundance and ‘Arak’( the spirit form of chang) in special cases!
Ladies drank lots of butter tea and were given ‘Phemar’ (butter tea with sugar, ‘lhabo’ (fresh Ladakhi cheese) to make dough out of ‘tsampa’ (roasted barley flour), ‘Chuptsos’ (highly roasted barley flour) or even with ‘pea flour’ or ‘apple flour’.
These the ladies would take home as gifts of the marriage party. Some of the senior ladies also consumed ‘Chang’ the local brew in the past and being tippsy sang folk songs while returning home.
Most marriages also include the birthday of the children in which case the invited relatives take one piece of butter (500 grams) along with one Kg of basmati rice. A ‘Rel’ consisting of token money is also added which was Rs.50 to 100 some twenty years ago today one would add Rs.500 to 1000.
At the consumption of the marriage the family would collect a sizable numbers of gifts also money which is a societal borrowed loan which requires to be returned not far in the future. These also gets registered in record so that return gifts and token maney are returned appropriately with little addition in the future.
The arrangements for the marriage is done by the close neighbours and ‘phaspoon’ (few of the core family supports) Bye for now.